Six weeks

You know that feeling when you're finally ready to book a five night trip to Paris that you've been researching for a couple weeks, and then suddenly realize that with changes to the airfare, it's actually cheaper to extend it to seven nights?! Neither did I till last night. But Paris, here we come! For a whole week!

The kids have their first school break coming up at the end of this month - a week off over Halloween. There's an insanely cheap airline in Europe, RyanAir, that has all sorts of rules to up-charge you if you're not paying attention (didn't print your boarding pass at home? they'll charge you $80 per ticket to do it at the airport), but if you follow the rules seems to be fine. We're flying our family of seven roundtrip from Stockholm* to Paris* for less than $400. No joke.

*Part of their ability to keep fares low includes flying from less-than-major airports, so we actually have to take a bus about an hour on each end to get to outlying airports. Even with the bus fares, it still ends up significantly cheaper than any other airline.

I found an AirBnB apartment in the outskirts of Paris but on a major train line for a reasonable price, so extending our stay a couple days was reasonable. Now that I have the air and lodging lined up, I can go back to focusing on the fun parts! Museums, parks, churches, oh my! If anyone has must-see suggestions in Paris, please send them to me. I've got a million links pinned for "visiting Paris with kids" ideas from favorite bloggers. I'm the only member of my family who's been to Paris, and mine was a very quick weekend visit, so this should be fun (as long as we remember to roll with the kids' abilities and give them time to run and rest as needed). I can't wait!

*****

I referenced some homesickness in my i/g post yesterday. The kids have been amazing troopers this past six weeks (it's been SIX WEEKS already!). This weekend was rough, emotionally, for everyone. Obviously I post mostly happy photos on i/g, for posterity and all that, but the truth was that there was so much whining, and more than a few tears. Some of the kids just wanted to stay home and take it easy, some wanted to go to a playground before they'd even finished breakfast! Saturday, when we went to Zara to look for replacement shoes for the younger kids, everyone spotted things they loved and wanted and needed, and leaving with only the shoes caused great drama and sadness, although we'd been very clear about the goal (ONLY SHOES) from the start. At the park after shopping, individual activities were fun, but someone always wanted to move on, and someone else sobbed about being forced to move on. I couldn't win with anyone. Should we grab a snack at the grocers for the walk home? YES! Oh, but someone wants cookies and someone else votes for chips, and now someone is sobbing again. I was so very done by the time we got home, but still had to go grocery shopping for real. It was a long day.

Sunday, I had intended for us to finally visit one of the Royal Palaces! When both Rachel and Meg - my most princess-loving children - burst into inexplicable tears at the suggestion, though, I knew we needed to reassess. Nathaniel had seen a botanical garden on a morning run, so we opted for packing a picnic and soaking up the sun on a walk to the garden. Unfortunately, the packing up part took long enough that everyone was hungry and grouchy by the time we walked out the door, and we're not a fast walking crew on our best day. It was a good idea, the outing, but it was a rough day.

My thoughts on a few of the numerous reasons we're all feeling stretched thin, grumpy, and emotional:

~ Six weeks without our family and friends, except occasionally via email/skype/mail. Even if we're not actively "lonely", thanks to social media and new classmates at school, we're missing people in a big way.

~ The quickly changing light is not helping. We lose about 5 minutes a day right now (2 in the morning, three in the evening), which doesn't sound like much, but we're down nearly three and a half hours since we arrived six weeks ago. That's big! It's dark at 6:30pm now. And for the first time this morning I noticed that it was barely breaking light when I woke the kids for school. The time change at the end of October will help the mornings some, but ruin our afternoons! One of the kids remarked that we'll have to get used to them going to playgrounds in the dark in the afternoons, but... really? Do people go to playgrounds with headlamps? Or do they just do all their playing during the mid-day daylight and then find ways to entertain themselves indoors in the evenings? We'll find out!

(I did a quick comparison. In the six weeks since we left, Lincoln has lost an hour and a half of daylight in a day, currently dropping by about two and a half minutes a day. Stockholm has lost more than twice that. So, if you find the quickly decreasing daylight affects your mood back home, consider how that might be affecting my kids' moods here... This stuff is no joke.)

~ Living in an apartment has me constantly asking the kids to stop being so loud, and to stop banging around, because I'm a big worrier about not offending others. More than I need to be, I'm sure. Peter remarked very truly the other day, "I miss our house, because at least there we could run around some!" There's the courtyard they could run laps in, but it has lots of big potted plants I fear them breaking. And it echoes, so I still find myself shushing them. I have begun letting Marianne and Ruth take them to nearby parks without me while I cook dinner, but again... the shrinking light is likely to put an end to that.

~ I'm doing my best to provide them with a happy, relaxed home life, but I'm confident that my heightened stress level affects their moods as well.

Meg had an especially tough weekend. Several times, she become melancholy, even to the point of tears, but couldn't explain what was wrong beyond missing home. I had a long talk with her last night, rubbing her back and reminding her that this trip is finite. We know how long we're here, and we know when we'll be home - we have the flights booked! So though the days may seem long, we know the end will come and we'll be back in our house, with our friends. She was still down, but smiling, too. She told me about some small fireworks displays that she, Marianne, and Henry already have planned for quick prep when we get home next summer!

Rachel and I have fun during our days, but she has lamented several times recently that she has no friends of her own here. She has watched her siblings make friends at school, and wants to know when she gets her turn to make new friends... but I don't know what to say. Swedish children her age have no English yet. And nearly all children here start daycare/preschool at one to two years of age, so there are no kids out during the day. The English language story times and play groups I've read about for expats focus on parents with very young children, pre-preschool age, assuming older kids will be in school. When Meg was in tears this weekend from homesickness, it didn't take long for Rachel to be inspired to tears as well. Good times!

Peter is going through a phase (does it count as a "phase" if you don't really expect it to end?) of being hungry ALL THE TIME. All of it. He barely finishes chewing his last bite of dinner and declares he's still hungry, to the point of tears if I tell him he needs to take a break from eating so his stomach can decide whether it's full. Oy. I quizzed some friends with an abundance of sons, and it sounds like this is fairly typical of boys (and occasionally girls) and I should get used to it. And feed the kid, I guess. The lack of easy distraction - not being able to send him outside to play easily - is only compounding the issue, because boredom makes him remember he's hungry.

I am excited to tell the kids about our upcoming Paris trip this evening, and to start reading about the city with them and choosing the places each most wants to visit. I already talked to Ruth about a possible day trip to Rouen to visit the museum and churches there that honor Joan of Arc (her confirmation saint). Now that our trip has lengthened, I'm confident we'll make that pilgrimage! I am hopeful that having this upcoming trip on the calendar will help get everyone focused forward rather than dwelling in today's grumps.

An added bonus! Just two days after we return home from Paris, Tom is coming to visit! It will be our first visit from family, and we are so excited he was able to add a stop in Stockholm to his work trip to Oslo. (Peter's birthday happens to fall on the day between Paris and Tom's visit, so that whole week will be a whirlwind of fun!)